What does it mean to be a man?
In today’s world, young men are being pulled in every direction by influencers, social media, and outdated ideas of masculinity. The message often sounds the same: be tough, stay quiet, don’t cry, “man up.” The relationship between men and emotions needs to be highlighted.
But here’s a truth that needs to be said out loud—you are allowed to feel. You are allowed to be vulnerable. And it doesn’t make you weak—it makes you real.
A group of male staff were reminded of how they felt at the age of sixteen and had the idea – “if I could tell them how the rest of the story goes, they’d never feel the need to hide, be insecure, or mask their emotions to ‘be tough'”.
They shared their lessons about manhood, emotion, and strength. Their words are more than personal reflections—they’re reminders that growing into adulthood doesn’t mean shrinking your feelings. It means learning how to lead with empathy, resilience, and heart and that men and emotions can be spoken out loud.
“I felt pressure to figure everything out—career, relationships, life. I compared myself to others, even without social media. I can’t imagine how intense it must be now.”
Mr Dix overcame this by focusing on what was in front of him, through his friends, and controlling what he could do with his studies and family.
“My family taught me that success comes in various forms and it doesn’t always go in a straight line.”
He opened up about the pressure he felt as a teenager to be everything for everyone—to fit in, succeed quickly, and never fall behind. He shared how failure once hit him hard in university, leaving him distraught. But today, he’s thriving in a successful career, helping others, and proud of his journey.
“Failing three modules didn’t end my story—it helped shape it. That failure didn’t define me, nor will it ever.”
He used to believe strength meant staying silent, never crying, and handling problems alone. But over time, he learned that real strength is showing up as your whole self—especially when things get hard.
“I believe ‘man up’ is such an outdated term. Strength is about emotional intelligence, resilience, and showing up for others.”
Mr Hazel found it challenging to write a heartfelt letter to his younger self, something full of wisdom and lived experience:
“You’re growing up in a world that tells boys to ‘man up,’ to stay quiet when hurting. But the real strength isn’t silence. It’s honesty.”
He reminded his younger self—and all of us—that the world will tell you to hide your emotions, wear a mask, and act like nothing hurts. But growth happens when you let those walls fall.
“You’re wondering if you’re good enough if you’ll ever feel like you truly belong, and whether people see you. They do. And one day, you’ll see yourself too.
You’ll cry. You’ll ask for help. You’ll open up. And those moments will change lives—including your own.”
His message to his younger self is clear: You can be ambitious, lead teams, build communities, and be successful—not because you’re the loudest or most demanding, but because you care. Because you lift others up. Because you listen.
Mr Hazel tells of how he learned that he is not above anyone and how respect for others taught him the power of connections. He also knows the power of forgiveness and how it will take you further than revenge ever could.
“Your value isn’t in how loud you shout, how tough you act, or how much you carry alone. It’s in how you rise and lead with your heart.”
It means:
Masculinity isn’t one thing. It’s not about shutting down your emotions or “acting hard.” True masculinity is knowing yourself, owning your story, and having the courage to grow.
So to every young man reading this:
You don’t have to bottle things up to prove yourself. You don’t have to go it alone. Your emotions are not your enemy—they’re your guide.
You’re not less of a man for showing how you feel. You’re more of one.
If you’re ever struggling, reach out. Speak to someone. You’re not alone—and you never have to be.
Let’s rewrite the script. Let’s redefine strength—together.